Monday, September 7, 2015

Test your dream – Humorous article

Test your dream – Humorous article 

Do you have any friend who motivates you to such an extent that you get into some deep trouble. I also have one such friend. One day he told me ‘Live your dream, man; live your dream‘. I said. ‘What. Living my dream? How can I live my dream? I always have lions and tigers in my dream. How can I live with those animals?  

‘You…, dream is a metaphor’.
‘Whataphor’
‘Metaphor’
‘Oh thataphor. Referring to something else’.
‘Yes. It refers to your goals in your life’.
‘Ok But the problem is that I have too many girls in my life.  Sorry. Too many goals in my life.’
‘Choose the best one.’

‘OK I want to become a professor, but student is the problem .I want to become a manager. But team is the problem; I want to become an actor. Ya. That is a good one.  I might be a problem to public.  But no problem for me. OK I have chosen the goal. To become an actor – that is my dream.’   

I informed my friend and rushed to a film institute and met the principal. He looked at me and cried with happiness. ‘Hi. Where have you been man? You look like Denzel Washington.  You can become a good actor. Join our institute immediately and pay the fee of Rs. 25000 now itself.’ ‘What. Denzel Washington!’ I paid the fee immediately. Then he said’ you have to learn fighting and dancing.  Separate fee for that.’

 What, fighting and dancing. I do fight with my wife at home. But she only wins all the time. Even in verbal light that is the result. I am also fighting with BP, Diabetes and Asthma. No. Physical Fighting is not good for my health, at this age.

Dancing! We are supposed to move our hips here and there. But my hip is everywhere all around my body.  First of all, I have to locate that part - the proper hip and make it move.  I am ready to move my hip but I don’t know whether my hip is ready to move with me. Not possible.

I told him. ‘Sir, Denzel Washington is a character artiste. Let me play the character role. No fighting and dancing.’ He looked at me sympathetically and then agreed. ‘Ok, But you have to bring all your emotions to your face ‘.

‘Sir, if I bring my emotion to my face, I might get into wheezing, as I have asthma.’
‘No problem you can even cough if you want to.  The more diseases you have, more effective the non-verbal acting. And then, you have to deliver this dialogue powerfully.   Now try this dialogue’.
‘You are not judged by the color of your skin, but by the content of your character’
I repeated ‘You are not judged by the color of your pant, but by the color of your shirt.’
‘This is not Textile stores, man. This is acting institute. . Try this one.’
‘We should fight in the air; we should fight in the beach; we should fight in the street, in the hill, we shall never surrender to the enemy.’
‘Sir, Let us surrender to the enemy Let us live peacefully.’ This fighting, even in dialogue is not good for my health”

‘Ok Then try singing. Do you sing?’
‘Yes sir, I sing in the bathroom.’
‘That is within four walls. ‘
‘Sir, sometimes I leave the door open and there are only three walls ‘
‘Ok three walls.  But the issue here is not about the number of walls. There you are at home No problem for anybody other than your wife. But here you have to sing in public.  There could be problem for many. Anyway, sing a song for me.’
‘Solomon Grundy, Born on Monday’

“Stop, Don’t let him live till Sunday. Let him die on Monday itself. “Well Only one role is left for you now. That is Director’s role. You can depute the work to your assistant directors and sit on a chair and Say ‘start ' ‘cut’. Ok”

‘Sir one small doubt. When should I say start and when should I say cut.’
“Good question. I like that. When you start, say ‘start’. When you are finished, say ‘cut’ ”
“Thank you, good teaching Sir ‘Cut ‘“. 

                   I woke up from that dream.  Thank God. I have not lived that dream and I have not wasted that amount of Rs.25000.  Let me consult my wife and work on something which suits me as she is the suitable person who selects even my suit.

------------------------------------------------------------------Nagendra Bharathi

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